2-18-2012

Tuesday evening we got the call we had been fearing: Larry, my stepdad, had passed away after a ten-year long battle with cancer.  The last few months had been rough on him.  The news was not unexpected, but it was dreaded.  I wrote a few weeks ago about him and what he meant to me.  Selfishly, it’s going to be tough not having him around.  Even though I didn’t talk with him on a daily basis, the fact he was there to provide me advice was comforting.  I’ve grown accustomed over the years to refer to my folks with just one name, like they’re one entity: MomandLarry.  It will be strange calling just Mom.

Being away from family is one of the unfortunate circumstances we face by living up here.  We knew that by moving up here, we were sacrificing the ability to leave at a moment’s notice.  Even knowing that, it really doesn’t lessen the guilt of not being there.  I kind of liken us moving up here to what the settlers had to go through when they moved out west.  They left family behind, knowing they would never see them again.  Of course, we are able to communicate daily via phone or Internet with our families.  And, we don’t have to worry about our wagon train being attacked by surly bandits looking for a quick score.  Or coming down with cholera.  But we love gravy and we do have problems from time to time with running water and sewer. So, in our own little way, we are a bit like settlers.  

Our usable daylight has been increasing dramatically.  We are gaining over 6 minutes a day. More daylight means more time to be out riding on the tundra, including visiting the store in Emmonak.  It has been nice having eggs in the refrigerator.  And toilet paper in the bathroom.  And paying $9 a bag for chips.  It’s also warmed up, so it isn’t so painful outside.  I’m able to make the ½ mile walk to school without bundling up like Ralphie’s little brother in ‘A Christmas Story’.  At least I don’t have to wear long johns for now.   

Monica and I will be traveling to Waterville for Larry’s funeral on the 2^nd of March.  We will only stay for 5 days, but I’m glad we’ll be able to be there.  For 32 years I’ve looked to Larry for his approval and asked for his advice.  Now I’ll have to grow up and figure things out for myself.  But, I think I’ll keep his number in my phone just in case.