12-9-2012

After taking a week off from writing this blog, one would think that I would have plenty to write about. But just because I have stuff to write about doesn’t mean it will be written.  Just as when there is work to be done, don’t assume that it will be done by me.  I am what the scientists term as “a lazy- ass”. Actually, you can put the word “ass” after any adjective and it would probably describe me pretty well. (I’ll pause here because I know you will try out a few and say, “Yeah, he’s right.”)

This is the 'wrist carry' event in NYO.

We did have activities at the school. Our school participated in the Native Youth Olympics (NYO) along with several other schools in our district. Events consist of several different athletic and academic contests. One event our school excelled in was the stick-pull. This is an event where two contestants grab ahold of an eighteen inch stick, similar to how you hold an oar. They sit flat on the floor, facing each other. Their legs are outstretched with the bottoms of their feet pressed against their opponent’s. Then they pull. The winner is the one who pulls the stick out of his/her opponent’s hands. Our kids did surprisingly well in spite of being the smallest school competing. This should be a lesson to the rest of the Yukon Delta: Don’t try to take a stick away from a Nunam kid, you will lose. Or a candy bar. 

An activity I participated in was as a member of a reading curriculum review team. About a dozen teachers from our district got together at the district office in Mountain Village to help chose a new reading curriculum for our district. The new reading books were chosen by two people grabbing ahold of a book and the one who pulled the book out of the other person’s hand got to chose the curriculum. Then the curriculum director walked into the room and said we must discuss both programs and take a vote before making a decision. 

His stern voice of reason won out and we were forced to listen to two separate sales pitches from the publishers. During the sales pitch, we were encouraged to ask questions. I asked her how old she was. The Stern Voice of Reason suggested we ask pertinent questions. So I asked her if she thought I could fit 7 donuts in my mouth at the same time. She pretended not to hear me and muttered something about research-based data and best practices. Whatever nerd, I’m know I can fit them in. Then the Stern Voice of Reason encouraged me not to ask any more questions. 

After a day and a half, we took a vote and decided on a new curriculum for our district. Both would have worked out nicely so I know we made a good choice. Our state has changed our standards to align more closely to the common core standards, which has been adopted by most of the other states. This new curriculum will be a better fit that what we have now. I am happy we are changing curriculum from what we have now, as are most of the other teachers in the district. 

This is how trees grow down here on the Delta.

With the curriculum review finished, I can now concentrate on our Christmas program. Since our program is next Friday, I guess I have no choice but to do something about that. I may put a third grader in charge just to give them a life lesson. The lesson will be that planning a Christmas program is no fun. And I maybe I’ll have him write my blog for next week. Yes, I know I’m a Grinch-ass.

11-22-2012

Thanksgiving 2012 is in the books and the refrigerator is full of leftovers. Which is surprising because of the amount of food I ate. I guess it is a bit ridiculous when I look up to ask someone to pass the gravy and find myself alone at the table. Then I have to decide if the effort is worth it. I quickly decide that it is, and poured that liquid meat over my third plate. Really, I knew all along that I’d be using that Gravy, so it was not too smart to allow the bowl to be placed so far from my seat.

This is our group in Nunam. Guess which one is me.

We had a wonderful Thanksgiving here with our Alaska family. We had the usual fare: turkey, potatoes, stuffing, Gravy, green bean casserole, rolls, and other stuff I didn’t have room for on my plate. As we sat down to dinner, our guests spoke of the things they claim to be thankful for. I was looking down on our turkey and wondered that if Ben Franklin had his way, would we be eating eagle for dinner? When it was my turn I said I was thankful that eagles were protected. With that, there was a collective “Shut up Clay” and everyone started eating.

Our Alaskan family includes mostly other teachers. Essie is our special education teacher, and this year her boyfriend, Daniel, from Arkansas came to visit. Brittnay teaches language arts for the high school. And Bethany is our science and math teacher. We share many meals together, but not as big as this one. We all pitched in and made different dishes for the meal, so I didn’t get stuck with all of the cooking.  And it was all delicious.

There wasn’t much conversation at the table, mostly just the sounds of forks going from plate to mouth. From time to time people would ask someone to pass a plate or to ask Monica if I was really going to eat all of that. I did hear someone, whom I won’t name because it might embarrass his girlfriend, say that he stopped eating because he didn’t want to unbutton his pants. The way he said it made it sound like it was something to be ashamed of. I let it go because I was wearing my fleece pants with elastic in the waist (stretchy pants). But to be fair, I wear those pants most of the time around the house. 

The dessert choices were so much I could not sample all of them. For six of us, we had apple pie, two peanut butter pies, pecan pie, and carrot cake. By the time I got to dessert, I was only able to sample three of them. I’ll get to the rest later; that is what Black Friday is for.

                                                     

Black Friday is for eating leftovers and repeating the words, "I ate too much... again." For some, Black Friday is for standing in lines to buy more things to be thankful for. I have made a list of things that I’d rather do than participate in Black Friday shopping:

1. Everything else.

I suppose I could   go  on  about  the  downside  of   feeling compelled to purchase things we don’t need, but I’ll let it pass. I’ll instead think of the things that I am thankful for: My almost perfect wife, many good friends, a great family, a job I love, and a warm house. I’m also thankful that our plumbing is working better. We had some troubles with our sewer system at the house, but it seems to be working close to normal. Which means I don’t have to make the one-mile walk to and from the school every morning during our break. And this is especially comforting knowing the amount of food that will be eaten on this four-day weekend. With that, I’ll wish you a Happy Thanksgiving and let you back to your leftovers. 

11-11-2012

Sunset on Swan Lake.
We are standing in the middle of the lake.

Well, the elections are over for this cycle and the voice of the people was heard through the vote: the theme on our bulletin board will change.  The chant in our class wasn’t, “Four more years!” but “Change that board!”. At least our election wasn’t filled with fear mongering and distortions of the truth like a couple of adults I’ve heard about.

I’m not sure if I’m more proud of the fact that my students behaved better than the adults or disappointed in the behavior of the adults during this election. Good God, those commercials were driving me crazy. Each one tried to paint their opponent as some evil monster, hell-bent on destroying our country for no other reason than their pure evilness. And those were the pizza commercials. The campaign commercials were worse. One of my students found out that “Obama don’t allow gum!” I didn’t watch all of the debates, but I’m sure that was put out there. 

But we are changing the out board. I do believe that it has only been changed once since school started in Aug. One of my many shortcomings as a teacher is my inability to offer more art projects for my students. I know the kids enjoy it but it is difficult for me since I have no artistic talent. My creative process usually involves bacon somehow. And I won’t waste bacon by hanging it on the wall.

The board will be changed to turkeys this week. We are involved in a project with another class in Wichita, Kansas through video teleconferencing. I went to Seward earlier this fall for training on how to work and use this equipment, so now we’ll see how we do. I know the kids are excited about talking with students in Kansas. I hope to use the VTC more this year, connecting with other schools in the country. 

Working hard in Mr. Clay's class.

We are also going to start using our VTC to receive Yupik instruction this year. We will start this on Tuesday, so we’ll be getting a lot of use with this VTC. I am excited about doing this because I am much worse at teaching Yupik language to Yupik kids than attempting to instruct art class. The Yupik language is difficult for a non-Yupik speaker because of the sounds of the language. I could be totally fluent in Yupik and still not be understood by the elders. The instructor is a Yupik speaking teacher at another school in our district. This makes more sense than having me attempt it. I fear I would totally screw up these kids’ ability to ever learn their language. 

Now with the elections over for a while, we can be bombarded with Christmas commercials. I am already sick of the jewelry commercials where a man spends way too much money to impress his wife/girlfriend/mistress. And here I look like a schmuck because I gave my wife a new bakeware set with explicit instructions on when to make Cinnabon cinnamon rolls. We call them delicious rolls. 

I want to thank all of our veterans for their service. And I want to give a shout-out to all of my shipmates. Thanks for what you did/do and thanks for the memories. Some memories are still fuzzy, some are embarrassing, and some are confusing. But most were a blast. 

11-4-2012

I was looking through my blog stats and saw that this was my 100th blog posting. For me this is a big deal because I haven’t done many things 100 times. Here is a sampling of some of the things I’ve done 100 times: Said the words,”I’ll never eat that much at one time again!” I’ve even said this more than once in one day. “I’ll never drink that much at one time again!” Sadly, I’ve said this more than once in a day too. “I think I’ll just sit here and watch football on TV all day today”. This sometimes leads to the eating and drinking things mentioned above. 

I even had a student dress up as me.
Yes, the big kid in the Homer mask is me.

I have not read through my blogs yet, except to see check a date of an event from the past. This should be apparent because I don’t know if I repeat something that I blogged about the year before. Or last week for that matter, because sometimes while watching a movie I think of something and think that just made it up. Then Monica will roll her eyes and point out that I said that last time I saw that movie. And the time before. So I apologize if I ever repeat from an old post.

Halloween went well this year. I believe that Halloween should always land on a Friday, like they have some federal holidays always on Mondays. I didn’t really think about this until I was a teacher and Halloween fell on a stupid Wednesday. This is worse than the 4th of July falling on a Wednesday. The only thing on the kids’ minds that day was holding a bag full of candy. Then eating that full bag of candy. We did send a note home asking parents to have their kids stop trick-or-treating (or as looked upon by some as demanding candy while concealing their identity) by 9pm so their teachers could go to bed. When I reminded my class of this, they asked what time I went to bed. I told them that by 9:30 I was asleep in my bed. They laughed. Not the  polite laugh sometimes used to protect other’s feelings. They laughed like they just watched someone slip and fall on the ice with their arms full of groceries. They even pointed at me while laughing. But to their credit, nobody came to the house after 8:30.

Last night we had our Halloween/Fall carnival at the school. We had most of the kids come and play games and try to win cakes in the cakewalk. Monica and I set up our X-box with kinect. (It’s a video game system.) Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves, even us teachers who spent 6 hours setting the gym up. We don’t have many entertainment opportunities in our village, so even a game of beanbag toss is fun. 

Our carnival last night.

Now that Halloween is over, all of our attention can turn to whining about the lack of snow. We have very little snow yet this year. Usually we have a white Halloween, which had been Bing Crosby’s original wish. This year it is a brownish color from the dead grass. But it has been cold, so that will help with freezing the ponds and especially the Yukon, which we use as our winter road for our snowmobiles. The lack of snow will allow the water to freeze deeper without the blanket of insulation. 

So in honor of my 100th post, I challenge you to think of something that you’ve done at least 100 times. And then think of something you’ve done at least 100 times that wouldn’t get you arrested if you did it in public. I’ll share one last one:“It smells kind of funny, but it’s only been out of the fridge a couple of hours, I’m sure it’s ok.” There is another activity that goes with that, but I'll not share that one. 

10-28-2012

End of the first quarter. Report cards have all been mailed home and parent/teacher conferences have been held. I always feel funny talking to parents about their children. Of course I try to highlight the student’s successes but I also need to touch on areas where they need work. That part will always be a bit awkward for me because I know a parent doesn’t enjoy somebody else reminding them that their child may have difficulties focusing. But it is always awesome to be able to show a parent a paper their child wrote that surprises them. Or share an anecdote about something nice the student has done for another student.

I’ve written about this before, mainly because it brings up memories of my school years. And my report cards were not full of flowery adjectives. Unfortunately, blogging was not invented yet, so I had no way to vent my frustration. My outlet was to “not apply myself”. I was not a talented student. I’m not really sure why, because I did enjoy school. Well, not report card day.  But the rest of the time school was fun for me. 

Saturday afternoon on the way to school.

Another cruel part of report card day was that the school would send the report card home with the students. Today, we either mail them home or hand them to the parent at the conference. So, our teacher would give us the sealed envelope with instructions that they were not to be opened by anyone except our parents. We rode the late bus, so we had to wait at the school for our bus to make a 45 minute run before it came back to pick us up to take us home. 

I had to hold on tight to that sealed envelope for over an hour in my grubby little hands for fear of losing it. I knew that if I lost it, nobody would believe that story. I would be accused of destroying the evidence of my laziness. Nobody ever thought that maybe I was too lazy to conjure up such a scheme. I was forced to deliver the evidence of my shortcomings to my parents. 

My class doing a yoga exercise. Notice I am not in the picture.

What made the delivery worse was that I had two brothers who were talented students. Apparently, they did “apply” themselves. They were overjoyed to hand over their envelopes, knowing that warm smiles and possibly gifts from overseas would be coming their way. I stood a few steps back, hoping that in the celebration my parents would forget about me and my envelope. But they wouldn’t. Their joyous smiles would fade and their gaze would shift from the envelope to my eyes. Everyone in the room knew what to expect, but there was always some suspense. Maybe they were all hoping I had turned the corner and began “applying” myself. I didn’t and I was always sent to bed without supper.

Ok, maybe I over dramatized things a bit. I was always fed supper. But I do empathize with my students who may lose focus or take longer than needed to finish a project or even a single assignment. I feel for the less talented students and their plight. And I don’t enjoy talking to their parents about how “if they would just apply themselves”, their scores would improve. But I will never make my students hand deliver their own report cards. 

10-20-2012

I guess I missed a week. But, I have a good excuse. I was in Anchorage attending training for our after school program that I will be teaching. Ok,teaching isn’t a good verb here; I think juggling would describe it better. Either way, I have found a way to spend an additional six hours a week at school/work.

Swan Lake and our School.

The truly bad part of flying out of the village to Anchorage is that there are a lot of people there. Not New York City crowded, but more-than- 4-people-ahead-of-you-at-a-Walmart-checkout-stand crowded. And to answer your next question: yes. People in Anchorage Walmarts act exactly like people in Walmarts across our country. I did indeed stand behind the man with the full shopping cart and a handful of cash, telling the clerk to stop scanning when she hit $100. When that event happened, he then had the clerk take back some of the item that were deemed by him as unimportant, so he could add the important items. He did have the decency to scowl at me and say that this would take a while. I have seen this man in other incarnations at other Walmarts. Once as a drunk woman in Grove, OK and another as a confused, older woman with a tiny coin purse, a wad of coupons, and bad eyesight in Wenatchee, WA.

Even though I was in Anchorage only 4 days, I was ready to get back to Nunam Iqua. And in those four days things sure changed. Looking down from the plane as we flew over the tundra, I could see how much the ponds and lakes have frozen over. The small lake here in the village, Swan Lake, was 75% frozen over. It is not ready for me to walk on, but children and several rocks have found it sturdy enough to support them. Looking back at my time-dated photos for the previous years, it seems that the freeze is right on schedule. The Yukon is already starting to form ice, so that means the road will soon be reopened for traffic.

This weekend our school will be holding a community dance, featuring fiddlers from Emmonak. Communities up here have dances where they feature fiddlers regularly. Our village, sadly, has not had one in a couple of years, so people are really excited about this. It is difficult to imagine, but our village has only one event each year where the people gather, and that is our annual potlatch. Other than that, there are literally no community gatherings for the next 364 days. No places where people can just sit to share coffee, stories, and jokes. The post office is the only place where people are likely to bump into each other.  I believe that this event can help this community after a couple of rough months. 

Our whole school playing volleyball.

Now that I’ve had a couple of trips to the big city this past month, I think I’ll be hunkering down here until May. And I really don’t mind at all. I like being able to walk to work everyday. Not having to stand in line to buy Spam. And not seeing a car or pickup for another seven months. My daily arguments with the village dogs on my walk to work everyday gives me my anger-outlet. Plus, I think they are beginning to agree with my point about the upcoming election.

10-7-2012

When Monica and I were first married, we didn’t spend a lot of time together. You may think it was because of too much awesomeness too soon for Monica.  But it was because of our work schedules.  Monica was a 911 dispatcher at the time, working nights.  I was employed by FedEx,  working the normal 6am-7pm shift.  So we didn’t see each other much. I left for work before she got home, and she was getting ready for work when I got home.  She also had to work most weekends, so that didn’t work out for  us either.  

Then we decided that I would finish college and become a teacher.  Monica then worked more overtime so we could afford me going to school full time. I still worked at nights, driving truck for FedEx, but only for 5 hrs.  Monica started working 60 hours a week, so again, we didn’t see much of each other.

Fast forward to today.  Not only do we have the same schedule and work in the same building; we also teach in the same classroom. On top of that, I am her supervisor.  Yes, I am legally allowed, if not obligated, to tell my wife what she needs to do. This causes confusion on both our parts, because apparently at home, she is legally allowed and obligated to tell me what to do. And I’ve been informed, by Monica, that I must comply. When I ask, “By what authority?”, she just gives me that look. Gentlemen, you know that look, and ladies, you have perfected that look. That look has caused the delay of many football games and interrupted several poker games. That look has also kept the worlds’s population at a lower level than it already is. We are frightened by that look and you women know it.

I have yet to get that look in the classroom from my lovely wife.  She may roll her eyes when I tell the kids a story about my childhood that she thinks I am embellishing, but that is different from the look. She also thinks I use the word ‘poop’ too much in the classroom, but she doesn't try to stop me. When I ask her to do a task in the classroom, she politely says, “Yes Mr. Miller”. 

The best part of having her in the classroom is that she is able to help me with my disability: spelling.  I feel so alone when I am at the whiteboard (chalkboard for you old-timers) with the pen in hand, fumbling in my brain for the right letter order.  Unfortunately, the whiteboard doesn’t have those red lines appear under the word when I have misspelled one.  Usually, I’ll take a step back to get a better visual perspective of the word I was trying to spell.  Then will come a chorus of “HaHaHaHa.  You spelled it wrong!”  This by third graders. I don’t even get the courtesy cough, to let me know I should run back up to the board and erase it quickly.  Nope, just jeers and laughs.  With Monica there, I can confidently stand at the board while writing.  If I think I may have a problem, I just pause, wait for her to cough, then erase the word and use my thesaurus in my head to think of an easier word.  We have ridiculous and contradicting spelling rules.

I am thankful I have Monica in my classroom daily.  She is tough with the kids and is able to get the most out of them.  We both have the same philosophy on what should happen in the classroom, so it makes it easy to lesson plan with her.  And I always know when she’s mad at me because she won’t give me the courtesy cough and lets the kids yell at me.  I hate you resurant. (cough)